


Out in the Open

by sunflower_saracen



Category: Skulduggery Pleasant - Derek Landy
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Happy Ending, M/M, post tdotl, posted after reading seasons of was cause I was sad, written pre phase 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-03
Updated: 2020-05-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:55:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23981935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunflower_saracen/pseuds/sunflower_saracen
Summary: After the war, Dexter confronts Saracen about their relationship.
Relationships: Saracen Rue/Dexter Vex
Comments: 6
Kudos: 24





	Out in the Open

Dexter Vex squinted through the evening sun, hanging low in the sky over Dublin. He hadn’t been outside in days. Weeks, actually. The battle of Roarhaven had taken more out of him than he’d care to admit. Including an actual remnant. He grimaced at the thought, the darkness, the gap in his memory, the not knowing what he had done in that time. And the pain, the terrible pain of having his insides shattered as the remnant was torn away. It was, he supposed, an indication of his friendship with Valkyrie that even her evil alter ego would show him mercy – in her own sick way. He couldn’t help but feel grateful to her – he couldn’t bear the thought of having a remnant bound to him forever. He couldn’t imagine what Tanith Low must be going through. 

He winced as he got into the car – he still ached all over. He put the radio on while he drove. It was some metal band or something. Just white noise. His thoughts were too crowded to register how bad it sounded. When Saracen had called, asked him to come over, he almost didn’t agree. Almost didn’t pick up. He hadn’t spoken to any of the others since the dust had settled in Roarhaven, not even Skulduggery. He had gone straight to his flat in Dublin. So much had happened, he’d lost so much, so many people, and as soon as he was in the front door it hit him like a train. It was rare that he ever slowed down enough to let the life he lived catch up with him. But too much had changed. People had tried to call, of course. But he didn’t pick up. He sent them texts to let them know he was ok, that he was recovering. But when Saracen’s name popped up on his phone, he suddenly felt like he needed to hear his voice again. He hadn’t realised how much he’d missed it.

And somehow here he was, outside Saracen’s flat. Part of him didn’t want to go inside. Maybe it would hurt too much. He’d been thinking a lot, in his abundant alone time, about how he was going to say what he had to say. Whether he should even say it. But even as he was thinking about chickening out, he found himself getting out of the car.

Saracen answered the door with an uncharacteristically tight smile. “Hey. Come in.”

Dexter followed him inside, looking around at the room. It was messy, plates and cups and clothes strewn around the flat. It seemed Saracen wasn’t in much better shape than he was.

“How are you doing?” Dexter asked.

Saracen didn’t answer the question. Instead he walked around a corner into the kitchen, returning a minute later with two bottles. “Beer?”

“Oh god yes.” Dexter took it gratefully. 

A moment passed in silence before Saracen spoke up. “I’m ok. You know, for having a wall dropped on me.”

Dexter chuckled “I heard about that. That’s gotta be a Saracen special.”

“Oh absolutely.” Saracen smiled, sitting down on the sofa. Dexter stayed standing. “Yeah I can tick that one off the bucket list. Get crushed under a wall by the personified evil alter ego of one of your friends occupying the dead body of her super-evolved reflection.”   
The smile took Dexter by surprise, and it made something wrench in his gut. He had such a beautiful smile, it reached up to his eyes and made them crinkle. He thought about the last time he’d seen Saracen smile. Probably in France, when they’d gotten the dead men back together. It had almost felt like they were back in the old days. Back when they had belonged to each other. Or that’s what he’d thought, anyway. 

“Dex?” Saracen’s voice cut through his thoughts. He snapped back into reality.

“Hmm?” 

“I said, how are you?”

“Yeah. Yeah I’m ok.” Lie. “Just recovering, you know. I think- I think I’m in shock. A bit. Erskine, and… everything.” 

Saracen just nodded. Dexter continued “I guess I thought, after the war, I guess I thought it was all gonna be ok? I thought, we’ve all lost so much, there’s no way we could do this to ourselves all over again. I guess it was wishful thinking.”

“I know what you mean.” Saracen said, and then automatically, “But I know most things.”

Dexter looked at him for a moment, then picked up a pillow from the couch and threw it at Saracen. He laughed, and Dexter almost melted, and he lobbed it back at him, followed by another. Dexter made to retaliate but Saracen grabbed the pillow and pulled him down onto the couch with it. Dexter grunted and pulled the other pillow off the floor, aiming it at Saracen’ head. Saracen took it with both hands and leaned over it to press a kiss to Dexter’s mouth. Dexter froze for just a second, thinking about everything he had gone over on his way here, but he couldn’t help it. He melted into Saracen’s kiss, bringing his hand up to his neck, while Saracen tugged gently on Dexter’s bottom lip. He had forgotten how good this felt, how much he needed Saracen. He let himself forget, when he wasn’t there, so it wouldn’t hurt to miss him. 

Saracen slid his arm around Dexter’s waist, his fingers fiddling with the hem of his t-shirt. He broke away from Dexter’s mouth, earning a small sound in protest, and began kissing a line down his neck, sucking on his collarbone. Dexter let out a sigh, twisting his fingers into Saracen’s hair, tugging just a little bit. And then he thought, as Saracen’s hand found its way under his shirt, about the last time, and the time before that. It feels so good, though. The last time they’d had a drink together, when Saracen had gone home with the bartender. Saracen shifted, so he was straddling Dexter. So good. When they’d been about to break into the English sanctuary, and Saracen had taken Aroura’s hand, left with her. All those times throughout the years, when Saracen had picked up men and women alike. All those times Dexter let him. Because he didn’t want to lose him forever. Saracen’s tongue in his mouth. Goddammit. 

Dexter pulled out of the kiss, pushing gently at Saracen’s chest. That was the only hint he needed. Saracen saw the look on Dexter’s face and climbed off him, sitting next to him instead. ‘What’s wrong?”

“I can’t” Dexter started. He faltered. Took a breath.

“You can’t…?”

He stood up. “I can’t do this. Alright? I can’t do it anymore.”

Saracen frowned. He looked calm, but there was hurt in his eyes. “This? You mean us?” 

Dexter raised his voice slightly, without meaning to. “What us? What are we? Friends with benefits?”

Saracen looked a bit stunned. He didn’t know everything, after all. “I—”

“This, whatever this is, it was ok when we were young. We’re not young anymore.”

Saracen just looked at him, so Dexter continued. “I should have done this a long time ago. Would’ve saved myself some strife. What is it that we have? We see each other every once in a while, we fuck, we go our separate ways. You meet someone else, you take them home, have your fun and then toss them aside too. I don’t –” he faltered “I don’t want that, ok? I just didn’t want to lose you. Because getting to be with you some of the time was better than nothing. You’re my best friend. You’re one of my only friends left now. But I can’t keep doing this. Living like we’re 20. I need you. I’ve always needed you. But if you don’t need me then let me know, so I can start over. Because I need someone.”

He stopped, a bit shocked at everything that had spilled out. He looked at Saracen, but he wouldn’t meet his eyes. Dexter’s tone softened. “When Darquesse ripped the remnant out of me, before I lost consciousness, I was sure I was going to die. And I had so many regrets.” He took a deep breath “I love you, Saracen. And I didn’t want to die without telling you.”

Saracen finally met his eyes. And his eyes were full of tears. He still didn’t speak. 

There was a silence, where they just looked at each other. And then Dexter turned away. Picked up his jacket off the chair and started to walk to the door.

“Dex, wait.” He stopped, but didn’t turn around.

He heard Saracen stand up. “Let’s do this.”

Dexter turned around purely out of shock. “What?”

“I was being a coward. I’ve been a coward for hundreds of years. I- I didn’t give you everything, because I was scared. Of losing you. I think… I think I’m broken. I’ve never had a serious relationship. A real one. In 300 fucking years.” He chuckled, but there were still tears in his eyes. “I know I hurt you. I’m sorry”

Now it was Dexter’s turn to be silent. He didn’t think he’d ever heard such sincere words from Saracen Rue. He took a step towards him. “So, I want to try. I don’t want to lose you.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope y'all enjoyed! xx


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